Thursday, August 28, 2003
I Shall Have No Other Gods Before Me. This would be the first commandment in Christopher Hitchens' personal list of ten. His disdain for Judaeo-Christian tenets are revealed in a recent column brought to us by the confused people at Slate.
"Create them sick, and then command them to be well? What a mad despot this is, and how fortunate we are that he (God) exists only in the minds of his worshippers."
Basically Mr. Hitchens takes God to task for sins of precision and omission. He laments the lack of a lawyer's pen and a seer's vision in the creation of the 10 Commandments. Mr. Hitchens, in his hatred for religion ("the true problem is our failure to recognize that religion is not just incongruent with morality but in essential ways incompatible with it"), completely disregards the Spirit of The Law. A Spirit that imprints on the heart, not in stone.
God's love does not demand perfection or reciprocity. Christopher Hitchens demands the former but benefits from the latter.
"Create them sick, and then command them to be well? What a mad despot this is, and how fortunate we are that he (God) exists only in the minds of his worshippers."
Basically Mr. Hitchens takes God to task for sins of precision and omission. He laments the lack of a lawyer's pen and a seer's vision in the creation of the 10 Commandments. Mr. Hitchens, in his hatred for religion ("the true problem is our failure to recognize that religion is not just incongruent with morality but in essential ways incompatible with it"), completely disregards the Spirit of The Law. A Spirit that imprints on the heart, not in stone.
God's love does not demand perfection or reciprocity. Christopher Hitchens demands the former but benefits from the latter.
Tuesday, August 19, 2003
One Step Forward and 25 Years Back. I awoke recently to power interruptions in the northeast and gas lines in the southwest. Memories of eating poor man's fondue (Cheese Whiz and Wonder Bread) by sterno light and restraining my brother from extending the blackout to a gas station operator ($5.00/gallon was double our combined hourly pay rate) came rushing back. Can disco be far behind?
I suspect that it is time to untie the Not In My Back Yard attitudes of most Americans, myself included. In our underground utility community cubicle, a gnawing concern of mine is how to block the view of a distant high-voltage transmission line. Like Toto, I know there is a man behind the curtain. However, unlike Toto, I just don't want him to be seen.
Maybe it is time to begin the IMBY movement? Put your backup transmission lines, your windmills, your photovoltaic cell panels and your hydrogenerators in my backyard. I have the Home Owners Association approval papers here somewhere. Just leave a little pee patch for the pups and, oh, don't tell the wife.
I suspect that it is time to untie the Not In My Back Yard attitudes of most Americans, myself included. In our underground utility community cubicle, a gnawing concern of mine is how to block the view of a distant high-voltage transmission line. Like Toto, I know there is a man behind the curtain. However, unlike Toto, I just don't want him to be seen.
Maybe it is time to begin the IMBY movement? Put your backup transmission lines, your windmills, your photovoltaic cell panels and your hydrogenerators in my backyard. I have the Home Owners Association approval papers here somewhere. Just leave a little pee patch for the pups and, oh, don't tell the wife.
Friday, August 08, 2003
Enough Already! Am I the only one that has had enough of fact-based movies that have the death of an innocent as its centerpiece? I refuse to watch one more film about The Holocaust, about a Kennedy assassination, about the physical death of Christ. (My wife still can't believe I sat through Scorsese's version up until The Last Temptation.) Now comes The Passion, the "truth" about the last 12 days of Christ's life, directed and largely financed by Mel Gibson.
Couldn't Mr. Gibson find something more life affirming to do with his $25 million than to portray Christianity as a religion that exults death and to reinvigorate worldwide anti-Semitism? Who is going to want to see this movie with its graphic depiction of Christ's agony and its Aramaic and Latin dialog? Wouldn't a movie about the previous 12,000 days of Christ's life be more uplifting and unifying?
Frank Rich of The New York Times writes that Mel Gibson suffers from a martyrdom complex. Maybe he is willing to throw money away for his "art". (If the movie brings in more than $10 million worldwide I will be shocked.) I have to believe, however, that the debate surrounding the docudrama's ongoing "rough cut" previews is actually Mr. Gibson's aim. The film is merely a battle in his private war against The Vatican. Unfortunately the collateral damage of this battle could set the stage for the deaths of even more innocents, deaths that I will have no choice but to watch.
Couldn't Mr. Gibson find something more life affirming to do with his $25 million than to portray Christianity as a religion that exults death and to reinvigorate worldwide anti-Semitism? Who is going to want to see this movie with its graphic depiction of Christ's agony and its Aramaic and Latin dialog? Wouldn't a movie about the previous 12,000 days of Christ's life be more uplifting and unifying?
Frank Rich of The New York Times writes that Mel Gibson suffers from a martyrdom complex. Maybe he is willing to throw money away for his "art". (If the movie brings in more than $10 million worldwide I will be shocked.) I have to believe, however, that the debate surrounding the docudrama's ongoing "rough cut" previews is actually Mr. Gibson's aim. The film is merely a battle in his private war against The Vatican. Unfortunately the collateral damage of this battle could set the stage for the deaths of even more innocents, deaths that I will have no choice but to watch.
Glasses Off! I convinced my wife to take me to Spy Kids 3D recently. We had not seen either of the previous two editions but I wanted to see what great new things the techies had put together for 3D. Unfortunately, I was unaware that 3D is short for 3Disappointment. Not once did either of us have the impulse to duck out of the way of a phantom object hurling our way, or feel the compulsion to reach out and touch a film specter floating near us. Neither did anyone sitting near us. Clearly the 3D techies are way past retirement age. Give them their Gold Glasses and send them straight to the retirement home.
The Story? Was there a story? Oh ya..."We are all family". Funny but I don't seem to recall many non-caucasians (or puppies) in the "family". On the other hand, unlike a Disney film, the mother was actually alive at the end of the movie.
The Story? Was there a story? Oh ya..."We are all family". Funny but I don't seem to recall many non-caucasians (or puppies) in the "family". On the other hand, unlike a Disney film, the mother was actually alive at the end of the movie.
Friday, August 01, 2003
Bob Hope. Slate's Christopher Hitchens has written a scathing article on the Hopelessness of the man. Mr. Hitchens thesis is plainly stated in the final sentence of his politically motivated diatribe: "Hope was a fool, and nearly a clown, but he was never even remotely a comedian."
Bob Hope was a personality who used comedy as his primary voice. Was he the funniest comedian of his time? Not even close as Jack Benny, George Burns, The Marx Brothers, Abbott and Costello all were his better. The greatest belly laughs for me came from Buddy Hacket (at his raunchiest), Bob Newhart, and Bill Cosby. He was more humorous than Jerry Lewis in my opinion, but then again so was Dean Martin. Current comics such as Robyn Williams, Billy Cyrstal, Ellen DeGeneris and Dennis Miller also generate more laughs per joke.
Nevertheless, I found Bob Hope extremely funny and I mourned after he retired from hosting the Academy Awards. For me his genius was not in the joke (which he rarely wrote) but in the delivery. His self-effacing, reactive spontaneity was hilarious with his well-crafted adlibbing the icing on the cake.
By far, the most shameful (and motive-revealing) portion of Mr. Hitchen's screed was the degradation of Mr. Hope's USO tours. He writes: "Nobody had the bad taste to recall the moment at which Hope was openly booed by the grunts in Vietnam: He was to the comedy of the war what Nixon was to its negotiation and what Billy Graham was to its husky religiosity." "Comedy of the war"? Does Mr. Hitchens really find humor in any aspect of war, any war? All Bob Hope was trying to do, the best way he knew, was relieve some of the pain and let the soldiers know "what they were fighting for".
To paraphrase Cheech and Chong: Someone needs to take Blind Mellon Hitchens and "whack his peepee". "Bob's not here", but our memories of him thankfully are.
Please review SteynOnline for a much more balanced commentary.
Bob Hope was a personality who used comedy as his primary voice. Was he the funniest comedian of his time? Not even close as Jack Benny, George Burns, The Marx Brothers, Abbott and Costello all were his better. The greatest belly laughs for me came from Buddy Hacket (at his raunchiest), Bob Newhart, and Bill Cosby. He was more humorous than Jerry Lewis in my opinion, but then again so was Dean Martin. Current comics such as Robyn Williams, Billy Cyrstal, Ellen DeGeneris and Dennis Miller also generate more laughs per joke.
Nevertheless, I found Bob Hope extremely funny and I mourned after he retired from hosting the Academy Awards. For me his genius was not in the joke (which he rarely wrote) but in the delivery. His self-effacing, reactive spontaneity was hilarious with his well-crafted adlibbing the icing on the cake.
By far, the most shameful (and motive-revealing) portion of Mr. Hitchen's screed was the degradation of Mr. Hope's USO tours. He writes: "Nobody had the bad taste to recall the moment at which Hope was openly booed by the grunts in Vietnam: He was to the comedy of the war what Nixon was to its negotiation and what Billy Graham was to its husky religiosity." "Comedy of the war"? Does Mr. Hitchens really find humor in any aspect of war, any war? All Bob Hope was trying to do, the best way he knew, was relieve some of the pain and let the soldiers know "what they were fighting for".
To paraphrase Cheech and Chong: Someone needs to take Blind Mellon Hitchens and "whack his peepee". "Bob's not here", but our memories of him thankfully are.
Please review SteynOnline for a much more balanced commentary.
Do good fences make good neighbors and, if so, what will they bring to the next (cinder) block party? How's that for an imitation of HBO's Carrie Bradshaw (aka Sarah Jessica Parker)?
The other morning while reorganizing the garage (see previous entry), I heard the click-click-click of a car starter. Having spent several miserable winters in the northeast, the cause of the noise was unmistakable...a dead battery.
If our neighbors weren't home while our moving van was blocking their driveways a year ago, we have never met. Consequently, although I did meet her husband on move-in day, the dead battery victim remained a stranger to me...and I to her.
What was I to do, go over and acknowledge her situation or wait to be approached? I didn't have jumper cables, but I did have a car. Most of those whose opinions I respect (especially little sister) would have offered assistance, but some wouldn't. Did it matter that I was a 50+ male, raised in an age of white knights and distressed damsels but now living in the land of "who ask you to"? Should the belief that Arizona is the witness protection capital of the country factor in? Was our neighbor and her children in danger or simply inconvenienced? (What me overthink?)
In business school we learned that taking no action was just as valid an option as making the investment. I and the neighbor-in-distress chose not to include me in the solution. She called for assistance from an employed friend and resumed her traditional day an hour later. (I know it was a friend and not AAA because of the dirty looks sent my way as he arrived.)
Some fences are less tangible than those made of wood in the northeast or cinder block in the southwest. Some can not, in any manner, be judged as "good". Others, however, are appropriate and necessary but also scalable for neighbors in harm's way.
The other morning while reorganizing the garage (see previous entry), I heard the click-click-click of a car starter. Having spent several miserable winters in the northeast, the cause of the noise was unmistakable...a dead battery.
If our neighbors weren't home while our moving van was blocking their driveways a year ago, we have never met. Consequently, although I did meet her husband on move-in day, the dead battery victim remained a stranger to me...and I to her.
What was I to do, go over and acknowledge her situation or wait to be approached? I didn't have jumper cables, but I did have a car. Most of those whose opinions I respect (especially little sister) would have offered assistance, but some wouldn't. Did it matter that I was a 50+ male, raised in an age of white knights and distressed damsels but now living in the land of "who ask you to"? Should the belief that Arizona is the witness protection capital of the country factor in? Was our neighbor and her children in danger or simply inconvenienced? (What me overthink?)
In business school we learned that taking no action was just as valid an option as making the investment. I and the neighbor-in-distress chose not to include me in the solution. She called for assistance from an employed friend and resumed her traditional day an hour later. (I know it was a friend and not AAA because of the dirty looks sent my way as he arrived.)
Some fences are less tangible than those made of wood in the northeast or cinder block in the southwest. Some can not, in any manner, be judged as "good". Others, however, are appropriate and necessary but also scalable for neighbors in harm's way.
Thursday, July 31, 2003
Two Car Garage? Having bought a second car last weekend, much of the last several days was spent trying to return a two-car garage to its original state. Thank goodness we moved in only a year ago. Any longer and the walls, which had steadily grown to the thickness of Woody Allen's glasses, would have precluded even one car from calling the garage home. Why did it take more than a few hours? A number of rationalizations come to mind. The real reason, however, is rather than take the wife's advice, which would have involved a complete reorganization of the room, I had a better (read lazier) idea. And it worked too. Both cars fit. The problem...to get out of the cars, we needed to open a door. I didn't factor that in. My next effort was slightly more successful. The dainty one had little trouble. I on the other hand, because of my large bones (especially the ones in my stomach), was reaching for the grease gun. Now I'm sitting here waiting for my little bread winner to return home. If it doesn't fit tonight...we'll just have to move!
Tuesday, July 29, 2003
Battle at the Bridges. In spite of an imaginative Matrix-like opening, only the audience was more bored than Tiger with this edition of Monday Night Golf. If ABC can not capture the attention of "the franchise player" how can it retain a viewing audience? Here are a few suggestions:
1) Have Tiger compete against Swedish blonde beauties (No, not Annika Sorenstam). They seem to earn his interest.
2) Make the event a "major" since those are the only golf events in which Tiger really has an interest.
3) Since Caddyshack is Tiger's favorite movie, team him with the gopher against Bill Murray and Chevy Chase. (The gopher may have a scheduling problem. Bill and Chevy are available.)
4) Put Tiger's microphone on "Frank", his driver cover. (Unlike Tiger, Frank actually enjoys golf and has a sense of humor.)
5) Have the loser take a tour of duty in Iraq on security patrols. (Tiger may find that he prefers a 5 iron to an M16.)
6) Have Tiger play blindfolded. (At least he could avoid Sergio's antics.)
7) Invite whole dogs, not just their legs to the tournament and start calling the tall grass "meow" instead of "ruff". (These were Boo Boo's suggestions...He also wanted the ball washers to be changed to cat's rear ends but we won't go there.)
1) Have Tiger compete against Swedish blonde beauties (No, not Annika Sorenstam). They seem to earn his interest.
2) Make the event a "major" since those are the only golf events in which Tiger really has an interest.
3) Since Caddyshack is Tiger's favorite movie, team him with the gopher against Bill Murray and Chevy Chase. (The gopher may have a scheduling problem. Bill and Chevy are available.)
4) Put Tiger's microphone on "Frank", his driver cover. (Unlike Tiger, Frank actually enjoys golf and has a sense of humor.)
5) Have the loser take a tour of duty in Iraq on security patrols. (Tiger may find that he prefers a 5 iron to an M16.)
6) Have Tiger play blindfolded. (At least he could avoid Sergio's antics.)
7) Invite whole dogs, not just their legs to the tournament and start calling the tall grass "meow" instead of "ruff". (These were Boo Boo's suggestions...He also wanted the ball washers to be changed to cat's rear ends but we won't go there.)
Sunday, July 27, 2003
Tour de Lance. Maybe a name change (to Legstrong, Spiritstrong or even Buttcallousstrong) would be in order since his arms played only a supporting role in this record-tieing 5th straight victory. After Jan Ullrich (Salieri to Armstrong's Mozart) literally took a bow in Saturday's time trial, it was all over but the champaign drinking. Only Tiger Woods can be considered anywhere near the stature of Lance Armstrong. Fortunately Tiger earns most of his victories in the United States over a longer season and therefore finds the spotlight much more often. Maybe we could start a Tour de Lance to be held in America.
(Dennis Miller on The Tonight Show: "Only in France would the winner of an event be rewarded a yellow jacket.")
(Dennis Miller on The Tonight Show: "Only in France would the winner of an event be rewarded a yellow jacket.")
